[this is a version of a post which first appeared on my blog From the Front of the Choir]
Last week I wrote about getting feedback from singers and choir leaders. But not all feedback is equal.
Feedback can come in many forms: speech, writing, applause, by email, face to face, and so on. Sometimes one form is more useful than another.
But will you get the feedback you want? As Dr. Gregory House says in the TV series House: “Everybody lies”. Can you trust people’s responses? And are you even asking the right questions?
You might have a personal preference for certain kinds of feedback.
Personally I’d much rather write to someone than face them if I have a criticism. I’m happy to receive feedback in any form, but as a teacher and choir leader, seeing people happy and enjoying themselves is the best. Frowns and sideways glances is the worst.
You may decide that certain kinds of feedback are better suited to particular circumstances.
Asking questions while being taught a song might not be best. Better to leave it until the end. Comments forms are good at the end of workshops, but some people don’t like writing in public or have to rush off, so make sure you’re contactable by other means.
Not every kind of feedback suits everyone, so make sure there are always alternatives available.
Not all feedback is equal. Gossip is probably less accurate than face to face feedback. Although people don’t always tell the truth.
A cynical view at best, but there is some truth in this.
Often people want to please you or give you the answer that they think you want. Other times people want to be polite and not tell you what they really think. So take all feedback with a little pinch of salt. Unless of course everybody is saying the same thing.
Other times people might not know what they want, or maybe think they want one thing, but really want another.
I give out questionnaires to my choir every couple of years or so. The main questions are about repertoire: “What is your favourite song?” “Which songs do you like singing the least?”
I used to ask things like
I quickly discovered that there are as many answers as there are choir members! It is very rare to find consensus on any one thing. It made me realise that a choir is a group of people who all agree to sign up to one person’s vision: the choir leader. It’s rather like a benign dictatorship.
The other thing that I discovered is that people may say one thing, but actually think or feel another. Many times in the questionnaires people asked for more songs in English and more contemporary pop songs. So I included a few in our repertoire.
When the next questionnaire came round, it turned out that the most popular songs were always the foreign language ones, and the songs that were least liked were the pop songs in English.
To get the right feedback you need to ask the right question.
In Indian culture people often want to please. When I was travelling in India I would sometimes ask people if this was the right road to get where I wanted to go. They would always say “Yes!” because they wanted to please me. It was seldom the right road.
I soon learnt that the better question would be “Which road do I need to take?” and they would point out the correct road.
You might ask the choir if everything is OK when you see them frowning. They might answer “Yes” because the state of being lost and confused is normal, so everything IS OK. Might be better to ask “How can I make it easier for you to learn this tricky bit?”
You might ask the audience if they enjoyed the evening. They might say “Yes” and you think that means the concert was good. But maybe they didn’t like most of the songs, but they had a great time catching up with their friends and admiring the acoustics.
You might ask your choir leader if the second half of the song is the same as the first, and she says “Yes”. She means that the tune is the same, but you were asking about the lyrics and the harmony parts coming in.
We all need feedback. In our lives and in our work. But there are many different kinds, many appropriate contexts, and we can’t always believe what we hear.
Many actors say they don’t read their reviews because they get too affected by the bad ones. But they don’t read the good ones either. It’s all subjective and it’s all too easy to be swayed and have our inner negative thoughts or big ego awoken.
So take feedback lightly. Don’t focus on the one negative comment in your choir of 60 singers, but also don’t think you’re wonderful just because you get an encore at your next concert.
Keep it all in balance, but do keep trying to do it better and continue to ask for feedback. Otherwise you will become complacent.
What do you think of this post? Was it of interest? Do you disagree with anything? Do you have anything to add? Drop by and leave a comment. I’ll be very grateful!
